3 times I was stung by a scorpion, and lived to tell about it

The totally true stories of how I was stung by scorpions on three occasions.

Its sting is a combination of being stuck with a needle while being injected with some sort of toxic hot death serum. It is 10 times more painful than stepping on a nail or cutting yourself with scissors. (I can attest to both.)

What is it that has me afraid to step outside or walk around my house without shoes on? It’s part of the arachnid family and has a stinger (that I am convinced) can penetrate steel. This eight-legged, creepy creature seems to prey on human skin… mostly mine.

I'm talking about a scorpion. The wall climbing, under the door slithering, always ready to strike creatures are both toxic and scary looking.

And they are out to get me. Scorpions have attacked me three times at my own house.

My first experience was the most painful. An orange colored scorpion crawled onto my foot while I was outside, then plunged his wasp-like stinger deep into my skin.

The poison hit my system like a Mike Tyson right hook. 

Within seconds my foot was on fire and throbbing in pain.

A 911 operator connected me to poison control.

The lady on the other end told me whatever I do, do not put an ice pack on it. So I took off the ice pack I had already applied and guzzled what was probably eight ounces of Benadryl. (Exaggerate? Me? Never.)

The second time I was stung was in my own home. While vacuuming the carpet, a baby scorpion decided to show his family how tough he was.

He thrust that stinger over the rubber sole of my flip flop and into the side of my toe.

I’m sure his brothers and sisters were high fiving his efforts as I fell to the floor writhing in pain.

My latest experience with the scorpion family came just this week when I was outside doing yard work. I picked up a giant boulder and didn’t see the scorpion perched on top of the 20 lbs. stone. It attacked my hand, sending what felt like 1,000 volts of poison into my middle finger on my left hand.

The pain caused me to drop the boulder that was perfectly positioned above my right foot. It came crashing down on my toe, sending me into a pain cocoon that not even Superman could take. Within seconds my hand went numb and my foot was throbbing so much you could actually see the pain encompassing it.

The scream I let out could be heard from Apache Junction to Sun City.

I have since changed my entire thinking because of the most dangerous creature known to man. I no longer do house work or gardening and I wear steel toe boots all the time -- even to bed.

So if you are a scorpion and you are reading this I want you to know two things, I’m ready for you, and if I see you I’m going to go all Ninja on you… (whatever that means).

Editor's note: 

Scorpions can be a dangerous reality for desert dwellers. Of the 55 types of scorpions in Arizona, one is likely to cause severe medical problems: the bark scorpion. And some people with a history of severe reactions to insect bites or stings may have a more adverse reaction. If you are stung, you should call a medical professional or the poison center at 1-800-222-1222 to determine if you need to go to the hospital.

Copyright 2016 KPNX


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