I was on an Olympic team once -- at summer camp.
I like to think I'm smart, but light years away from Nobel Prize candlepower.
Those would be two strikes against me if I wanted to legally immigrate to the United States in President Trump's America.
The so-called RAISE Act, endorsed by the president, would create a merit-based system that favors legal immigrants to the U.S. with specific skills and honors.
The current system favors immigrants with families in the U.S.
I'm one of those legal immigrants -- I married an American. I'm now a American citizen.
Trump argued on the campaign trail that the U.S. was welcoming too many people who take jobs from Americans.
The president wants our new citizens to be young and wealthy Olympians or Nobel Prize winners, with two degrees in science, math or engineering and high-paying jobs waiting for them.
TEST YOURSELF: Take the RAISE Act test
I took the RAISE Act test and I flunked. I'm too old, my two non-science degrees mean nothing, and I can't find my Camp Robinson Camper of the Year award.
My 26 points were short of the 30 minimum for a shot at the limited number of green cards available under the proposed legislation.
But that makes me an All-American: By one estimate just 1 in 50 citizens could pass the test for legal immigration.